Oh my goodness. I am exhausted.

I have just returned from the Glamour Women of the Year Awards. Yes, yes, I accepted my award, cried a little, and gave a graceful speech.

Har, no. More like, I was there as a seatfiller and saw the most celebrities I've ever seen in one place. I am going to list them all so that I won't forget and so you can be positively green with jealousy: Pierce Brosnan & Keely Shaye Smith, Steven Spielberg & Kate Capshaw, Tom Hanks & Rita Wilson, Alexandra Kerry, Kelly Ripa, Katie Holmes, Susan Sarandon, Ethan Hawke, Judy Blume, Carolina Herrera, Anne Hathaway, Katie Couric, Aisha Tyler, Keri Russell, Alicia Keys, Nathalie Cole, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Carly Patterson, Jessica Capshaw, Kate Winslet, Jon Stewart, Sam Donaldson, Lisa Ling, and even Iman!

Whooo. How did they all look in real life? Just like they do on television, of course, except some of the women look positively frail, i.e. Kelly Ripa and Keri Russell. Aisha Tyler was so so tall in comparison. And Ethan Hawke needed a haircut. Katie Holmes seemed nervous while giving her presentation speech--her slump was as noticeable as ever. Kate Winslet looked gorgeous: healthy and glowing and she exclaimed during her acceptance speech, "I can't help myself. Women have cellulite! Women have wrinkles!" and went on to say that we shouldn't be afraid of growing older and having flaws. I agree.

Susan Sarandon also looked gorgeous in her fifties-style green satin dress. Don't worry, I'll give you a link to pictures from the night so you can see for yourself. Alicia Keys--damn that girl can sing! She gave a performance in the beginning, looking all beautiful in her gown that hugged her curves and hair pulled back simply. She cried during her acceptance speech, saying that though she doesn't usually cry at awards shows, she did at this one because it felt so genuine. She then promptly proceeded to leave after accepting her award. I could tell, because her seat was three rows in front of mine and she definitely didn't come back. Carly Patterson was very nervous during her speech and started crying when thanking her family.

Jon Stewart--sigh. I am in love with that man. He gave a funny speech about his boss, who won an award. He joked about how the Rapture was coming, and that the righteous would go to heaven, leaving the Democrats in control of the government. Quite hilarious. Much shorter than you'd expect him to be though. At one point, before the show started, I was literally walking behind Steven Spielberg and it felt so odd, that he was really standing in front of me. You almost expect there to be a glass screen between you and him, but there isn't. Kate Capshaw, his wife, looked.. odd. I don't think there is a better word to describe her appearance. Like she'd had work done, but I couldn't pinpoint what it was exactly. Tom Hanks looked exactly like Tom Hanks. And the woman who sat next to me kept telling me how nice he was in real life.

I got to sit in the same seat throughout the show which was both a blessing and a curse. Blessing because I had a pretty good seat, about ten rows back in the center, and also because I didn't have to keep moving around. Curse because I couldn't keep moving around in hopes of sitting next to a celebrity and whatnot. But man. It was so strange, and surreal now that I think back on it, though at the time it felt perfectly normal to be seeing Pierce Brosnan pass by with his wife, and Aisha Tyler talking on her cellphone. I can't believe it happened.

This all took place at the Museum of Natural History, apparently the first time they've done it there. And also the first time it's going to be televised, so if you go to the Glamour website, you can look up when it's going to show in your neighborhood. And if you want to see photos from the night, try HERE.

There were also lots of other women honored for various things--like Helen Thomas for her political reporting, Alice Coles for her tireless campaigning for a better neighborhood with clean running water, etc.--they made me feel so unaccomplished and yet so hopeful and inspired at the same time. I really need to get off my arse and do something with my life. But what will it be?

It's getting late and I'm tired. Maybe I'll share more later.